Dear Readers,

What is the right small adjustment, that will make the big change?

1


My client is upset about her son because he doesn’t do his homework just before going to bed so she always says, “Have you done your homework yet?” But he says, “You don’t believe me.” It's a common occurrence.



When she talked to her employment medical advisor, the advisor said, “You have a tendency to take on the problems of others. You should refrain from concerning yourself.” So she has been trying not to interfere too much.
We considered about better communication in her daily life. But I thought this problem was connected to stress so we should talk about how to be calm in a stressful situation.
Client: “When I don’t say anything”, he said,”You don’t look at me.”

Me:“Oh dear. Which is it? On the other hand, does he say, “None of your business.” ?

C: “No, when he is absorbed in his play, he doesn’t want my attention.”

Me “I see. When he does his homework, he wants you to look at him but when he does something he wants, he doesn’t need your support.”

C: "I guess so."

Me: “What is homework like to children? I guess they don’t like it. When he does something he likes, he doesn’t need your help. In short, when he does something he dislikes, he wants you to look at.”

C:”Absolutely.”

Me:I sometimes go to my parents house to see my nieces and they ask me to help with their homework even though it was the first day of the year. So my younger brother said 'It's New Year, so you don't have to do that' and passed by. But I thought they wanted to do it while I was there. When they try to do something, they think about who can help them. If there is someone who is fun and who they like, they can do their best.”

Her stress turns into happiness.

We should give consideration to someone's feelings over thinking about how to get children to do homework. That’s how we discover the truth.

*・゜゚・*:.。..。.:*・゜

■メモ

It's common occurrence. いつもの光景である。

to interfere 干渉する

That's how... このようにして…である。